Need to have a voice.

I have had a few things happen in the last month, that I just can't seem to put behind me so I am hoping that by writing about these things I can do that. 

The first has to do with my former church. I went back a couple of Wednesdays ago to take my little friend Phoenix to the Children's Choir. It was nice to see some of the changes - new carpet because of the flooding from the rain, a different lay out for the Wednesday dinner. And to see some of the things that I had started that hadn't changed - the glass bulletinboard, the brochure holder and that the Wednesday dinners were still going!

And I was greeted warmly by a few people - a couple even stopping to talk. Judy and Juanita it was so good to have a bit of a talk with you ladies. I had purposely picked a seat to sit in in the back of the sanctuary to be able to focus on Phoenix as she was nervous about joining the group - she had forgotten some of the kids, and some were new to her.

When all of the sudden, "Kathy, What are you doing here?" came from the minister. I turned to her and explained that Phoenix & her folks had moved back temporarily and that Phoenix had been invited to try out the choir again and that I thought that All were welcome to visit the church. She looked a little startled and said, "Of course EVERYONE is welcome."  But I was left feeling I wasn't welcome.  Oh well. I don't think I am ready to return.  

The other thing that happened was that I found out that a person I had thought was a friend had (two years ago when I left the church) been telling people that I had been spreading rumors about the church. I was very upset with this and had to double check the meaning of rumors. 

A rumor is often viewed as "an unverified account or 

explanation of events circulating from person to person 

and pertaining to an object, event, or issue in public 

concern" and/or Rumors are also often discussed with 

regard to "misinformation" and "disinformation" (the 

former often seen as simply false and the latter seen as

 deliberately false.

This had of course made me upset as I was very careful about what I said and who I said it to regarding what happened at the church concerning myself. I only repeated what I was told - maybe those were lies? And told about my feelings as to why I quit.  

So does this make what she said a rumor or an out and out lie? Hummm something I have been thinking a lot about. 

So for the present I miss my friends at the church but for now I am enjoying my Sundays being unscheduled and I enjoy doing daycare for a my few children and I am doing the OT for my hand after my surgery that I had in July. 

Blessed be,

Kathy